Since October 7, 2023, the lives of hundreds of Israeli women and their families have been tragically upended when their husbands were killed in combat. Losing a spouse is a life-changing event, and the IDF Widows & Orphans Organization (IDFWO) has been working assiduously for decades to provide assistance to widows and their families.
Yet, in the complex reality that is Israel today, there have been instances in which those who lost spouses during the war were themselves attacked as part of enemy strikes on the Israeli population.
This story tells the unlikely, almost incredible stories of two widows whose husbands died defending their country on the first day of the war, whose homes were damaged by Iranian ballistic missiles in June 2025, and the response of the IDFWO to these tragedies.
Thirty-one-year-old Rotem Blohman speaks in even, measured tones about the loss of her husband, Sgt. Maj. Yakir Blohman on October 7, 2023, and how her life and the lives of her children have changed irrevocably since that date. She smiles when she mentions her two sons, eight-year-old Imri and five-year-old Koren, but life for Blohman and her family is far from simple.
On the morning of October 7, Yakir, a detective at the Segev Shalom police station, left his wife and children at home in Dimona when he learned of the Hamas attacks, and drove with the police station commander, Itzik “Bazuka” Buzukashvili in an armored jeep to the site of the Nova Music Festival in Re’im, where Hamas terrorists had attacked those in attendance. The two repeatedly entered the site of the festival, rescuing fleeing festival-goers, until they were killed by RPG fire from Hamas terrorists.
Rotem’s first exposure to the IDF Widows & Orphans Organization took place at the Otzma children’s camp that was held in Kfar Nokdim during Chanukah in late 2023, just a few months after her husband’s death. At that camp, Tami Shelach, then IDFWO chair, told the widows about the death of her husband, Lt. Col. Ehud Shelach, during the Yom Kippur War in 1973. “She said to us, ‘You can get up [from your loss].’ Until then, I thought that my life was over, but she told us that there was more life ahead of us. It planted the idea within me that it would be possible to get up, and that my children’s lives were not lost.”
Blohman adds that for her children, interacting with other children at the camp who had lost their parents recently made life a bit easier for them and gave them hope. Many of the camp counselors themselves were IDF orphans. “Children have this kind of understanding that you don’t always need words to understand difficulties,” she says. “It’s very normal for a child to laugh and run around and then cry a few seconds later, and it doesn’t seem strange to them. They know what it is, and they can come and say, ‘Listen, I have moments like that too, or I was like that right after my father died, and over time you learn how to cope.’”
Since her husband’s death, the IDFWO staff has remained in touch with Rotem, providing her with assistance and valuable information, and the widows themselves have created their own WhatsApp group. This past year, Rotem, an expert in child development who works with autistic children, moved to Petah Tikvah with her two sons.
In the early morning hours of Monday, June 16, a ballistic missile launched from Iran struck a residential block in Petah Tikvah, killing four Israelis, causing extensive damage to buildings, and destroying a nearby kindergarten. Four buildings were evacuated. Rotem and her two children were in the safe room in their apartment, but the shock waves from the blast across the street shattered the windows in their home, damaged part of the kitchen, and shattered plasterboard walls in the apartment. Rotem says that she couldn’t allow herself to break down amidst the tension of the incoming missiles, since her children were with her. “I didn’t want my children to experience that terrible feeling of helplessness again.”
The night before the attack, Rotem had prepared dough for a yeast cake. The missile struck in the early morning. “We cleaned everything up,” she recalls, “and at 8 AM, I said to them, didn’t make this dough just to let it sit there. We are going to bake a cake.’ I think it showed the children that life goes on.”
Rotem says that the trauma of the Iranian missile strike was difficult for her children to accept. “They know that their father was killed by a missile, and if a missile could strike their big, heroic father, that means they could be too, but this time it’s in our house, and it’s very difficult to experience these feelings over and over again. The feeling that the ground is unstable, and that there is no safe place.”
In the chaotic hours after the missile attack, the IDFWO staff reached out to Rotem, not only to offer financial aid, but with something deeper – a sense of presence. “They called, asked how I was, and told me that if I had any difficulties, they were there, ready to think of solutions together,” she recalls. In that moment of overwhelming uncertainty, when even knowing what she needed felt impossible, the simple act of being seen and supported offered her a measure of stability.
“Raising broken children when you yourself are broken is very, very difficult,” says Rotem. She adds that as time passes, the feelings of pain and loss increase. “Once this war ends, our war will be just beginning. We are no longer the same people we were two years ago, and we need to learn to live anew. I thank the IDFWO, which accompanies us throughout our journey, and its supporters who help us function.”
Twenty-eight-year-old Yuval Zaushnitzer lives in Tel Aviv and studies law and government at Reichman University. On October 7, Roey Chapell, her partner, a company commander in the Nahal Reconnaissance Unit, fell defending the communities of Nir Yitzhak and Sufa. He was killed near the Dangour monument, the memorial for those who died in the battles of 1948 defending Kibbutz Nirim.
Roey, a native of Zichron Yaakov, was nearing the end of his seven years of military service and was due to be discharged. Roey and Yuval were scheduled to fly to Australia in January 2025 and were planning to get married soon after.
“IDFWO is amazing and Shlomi Nahumson, the CEO, is very sensitive and is particularly helpful at difficult times, such as anniversaries,” says Yuval. “I am a part of the IDFWO group of women who do not have children, and he is very attentive to our needs. Shlomi provides emotional and financial support when I need more help. He is very attuned to these things. They are continually helping me.”
Yuval keeps in touch with other widows, and they get together frequently. “Each woman goes through her own process,” she shares, “but we all relate to and identify with one another.”
On June 16, ballistic missiles launched from Iran struck the building where Yuval was living. She and the other residents were safely ensconced in the building’s air raid shelter. However, the building was heavily damaged, and she could no longer live there. A week later, she moved to another apartment near Kikar Habima.
“After the missile attack, IDFWO staff checked with me to make sure that everything was ok and asked if I needed anything. The concern and consideration that they exhibited was worth all the money in the world,” says Yuval.
The loss of her partner on October 7, coupled with the damage done to her home from an Iranian missile, is staggering. How does Yuval cope with what she has experienced over the past two years? “I deal with a lot of things through humor,” she says. After the missile attack, I just walked into the house and said, “Well, another terrorist organization has hit me. It’s frustrating and it’s disheartening.
“But in my mind, I always tell myself that it could be worse,” says Yuval. “At least Roey was not kidnapped. At least I have a grave where I can visit and cry, because there are people who don’t even have that. I constantly remind myself that things could have been worse. I could’ve been inside the house when the missile landed and gotten injured. At least no one died. Everyone was with me in the shelter downstairs.”
Yuval adds that many families haven’t received answers as to what exactly happened on October 7. “There needs to be a state commission of inquiry to investigate this matter, because people deserve answers. As a woman who still hasn’t lost hope in this country, I don’t want my children to grow up and experience the next disaster.
“The IDF Widows & Orphans Organization is truly amazing,” she concludes. “They’re incredible, and I love them. They genuinely help me in every aspect of life.”
During the 12-day war with Iran, IDFWO provided financial aid to three widows and two adult orphans whose homes were struck by missiles, distributed food vouchers to 370 widows with children under 18, opened an emergency hotline, and conducted a trauma webinar offering real-time guidance and psychological support for families with young children.
This article was written in collaboration with IDF Widows & Orphans Organization (IDFWO).