The phrase “back to school” produces mixed emotions in children. On the one hand, a new year is filled with a sense of excitement about returning to familiar surroundings and friends, and much as they might not be willing to admit it, most kids do enjoy learning. But at the same time, school brings with it the well-known difficulties for youth of having to wake up early, stay attentive in class, and, of course, the rigors of homework, tests, and assignments.
For children with disabilities and their families, this period of transition from a more relaxed summertime is particularly challenging. For Israeli families with children with disabilities, those challenges are further compounded by nearly two years of an “emergency routine” of uncertainty and stress.
Approaching this period effectively and compassionately demands a great deal of patience, first and foremost with the understanding that transitions are harder for children with disabilities.
They often face challenges in expressing themselves and understanding their surroundings. They may struggle to identify or articulate emotions, and in some cases, even recognize the meaning of the emotions they are feeling.
The result is that they may “act out” through behavior that might be viewed as distracting or unacceptable in many traditional educational settings; crying, screaming, restlessness, regression, or changes in eating and sleeping patterns.
To be very clear, while some teachers may attribute this to students who don’t have disabilities as signs of defiance or anger, among children with disabilities they are often signs of distress. A child who exhibits inappropriate behavior, for example, may be frightened or overwhelmed with no other way to express it.
In the mind of a child with a disability, when he or she doesn’t understand why they might be placed in a new school or classroom, that can translate to a feeling of insecurity. Any changes in routine are often perceived as a surprise, which can lead to feelings of confusion and even sadness.
As parents and educators, there are practical responses we can embrace to address those legitimate emotions and that will help the child through these periods of transition.
Prepare in advance and minimize any surprises
Begin preparing your child at least one to two weeks before school starts, and keep communicating even as school begins. Speak frequently about the changes, using simple language and visuals, such as photos of the building, staff, or route to school. Ask your child’s teacher or therapist for a personalized “social story” – a picture-based guide to what they can expect.
If possible, visit the new environment in advance or meet the teacher to reduce uncertainty.
Reinstate a structured daily routine: Start to reintroduce regular wake-up times, mealtimes, nap times, and bedtime routines that will best conform to what the child will need when he or she returns to school. Use verbal explanations to describe what’s changing and involve your child in the process in order to build understanding and comfort.
Use a comfort object: Let your child take a beloved toy, blanket, or other comfort item that offers familiarity and emotional support. Choose an object that is appropriate for his/her developmental stage and easy to carry to school.
Communicate with the staff: Keep open lines of communication with your child’s educators. Share any significant updates or challenges that arose over the summer, as well as what helps your child feel safe and calm. This insight is especially helpful when behaviors differ between home and school.
Watch for signs of distress: Transitions can cause stress that appears as aggression, withdrawal, changes in appetite, or sleep disruptions. Recognize these as signals of anxiety. Respond calmly, provide structure, and use familiar soothing techniques like music, hugs, or storytelling. Keep the educational team informed so they can reinforce support in the classroom.
In conclusion, the return to the school routine for children with disabilities requires preparation, understanding, patience, and close cooperation between home and school.
As parents and educators, it is critical that we recognize and respect that we are integral partners in making our children feel protected and confident.
If we are prepared and equipped to accept that responsibility by embracing the tools of preparation, emotional support, and patience, we can look forward to a new school year of productivity, success, and joy.
The writer, an art therapist, is head of the Emotional Therapy Division at Israel Elwyn, Israel’s largest nonprofit organization making a profound impact on the lives of over 5,300 individuals with disabilities.