When a machine fails, our first reaction is often frustration. A computer freezing at the worst possible moment, a navigation app leading us straight into a traffic jam, or a washing machine suddenly stopping mid-cycle – all are everyday situations that trigger anger and irritation.
We just observed Yom Kippur – the Day of Atonement – in which one asks for forgiveness and focuses on God’s mercy and the importance of repentance and forgiving others. Forgiving is central to all three Abrahamic faiths – and this shows forgiveness’s ancient and revered nature as a virtue. Research has shown that forgiveness in general is more common among older people and women.
The sentiment has been extensively studied across various academic fields, but not in relation to human-machine interaction. The subject doesn’t involve just curiosity; ever-evolving technology presents new functionalities and experiences through advancing possibilities like artificial intelligence and machine learning, which are implemented and integrated into devices and routines.
Now, a new study by two Israeli researchers offers a different perspective – that we can also apply mechanisms of forgiveness toward technology, similar to the way we do with other people.
In the study, published in the scientific journal Frontiers in Computer Science under the title “Forgiveness in human-machine interaction,” Inbal Holtzman and Prof. Galit Nimrod from the communications studies department at Ben-Gurion University of the Negev (BGU) in Beersheba examined this phenomenon for the first time. They sought to understand what forgiveness means in human-machine interactions and how users decide to continue using a technology even after it has failed them.
Communication technology
While washing machines, microwaves, refrigerators, and other electronic devices also fail, the team focused mainly on devices of information and communications technology designed to process, store, or communicate information using digital or electronic technology. “We wanted to explore whether feelings like disappointment or anger toward technology can give way to forgiveness, allowing people to keep using it without resentment,” Holtzman explained.
To investigate, the researchers conducted focus groups with 27 young adults – students and professionals – who were asked to recount their experiences with technological malfunctions. The conversations quickly moved beyond technical details – participants described their experiences in highly emotional terms. “The computer betrayed me,” “The app let me down,” “The phone doesn’t understand me.” They were then asked how they dealt with these situations, and whether they were able to forgive the machine. The analysis revealed several distinct paths to forgiveness.
In an interview with The Jerusalem Post, she explained that the team interviewed younger people because they are most connected to digital technology, but that they would like to study people over 40 in the future who “may be more frustrated by technological mistakes, but they also may be more forgiving.”
Some people said they wanted to break their smartphone into pieces, “but apparently, they didn’t go that far. It just shows how traumatic the experience can be.” She herself is furious at her robot floor cleaner, because it always gets stuck – and then I wash the floors by hand. “My husband loves it, so I try to let him do it. Also, Waze regularly sends me to a traffic jam or a closed road, but I still use it even when I’m going to work and know how to get there,” Holtzman admitted. ChatGPT also makes many errors – but it admits them and says ‘sorry.’ Maybe more devices that make mistakes should apologize or even pay a fine.”
If the advantages of the technology outweighed the damage caused by the malfunction, some were willing to overlook the problem and move on. Others tended to place responsibility for the error on human beings – programmers, engineers, or even themselves as users – which made it easier to forgive.
Some sought ways to communicate with the technology or the companies behind it – a pop-up message acknowledging the problem or the option of contacting customer service was seen as a step that enabled forgiveness; many accepted technology as an inseparable part of modern life, even if it is not flawless.
People who were more familiar and comfortable with technology tended to be more forgiving, perhaps because they understood its complexity and the inevitability of mistakes. However, those who were wary of smart devices from the outset were less forgiving and sometimes abandoned the technology after a failure.
The amount of money spent on buying the technology, replacing it, or fixing the error, and the time invested in the error itself or trying to fix it, affects people’s feelings. The higher the amount of money spent, or the more “invested” they were in fixing it, the less forgiving they were. Those who identified themselves as “technology lovers” and worked in the hi-tech field seemed to forgive the erring technology more easily.
“Our relationship with machines is no longer one-dimensional or purely technical. We treat them like companions – we get disappointed, angry, but also forgive,” Nimrod concluded. “In many ways, our phones, apps, and devices have become part of our social and emotional circles.”
These findings also carry practical implications. If technology companies recognize that users need not only technical solutions but also acknowledgment of their frustration, they may design more “apologetic” or transparent systems. A screen that explains what went wrong, or a robot capable of saying “Sorry, there was a problem,” could increase trust and improve user relationships.
In a world where robots, apps, and artificial intelligence are becoming constant companions at home and at work, understanding these mechanisms of forgiveness may prove crucial. “Perhaps in the not-so-distant future, we will get used to hearing not only ‘Update completed successfully,’ but also ‘Sorry, we made a mistake.’ The real question is whether we will be willing to accept the apology – and forgive,” Holtzman added.
The ability to improve the users’ experience and foster the acceptance of erring technology, rather than abandoning it, might be closely connected to the forgiveness scheme of the user.