As I type these words, we are marking two years of the worst attack the Jewish state has known. Without undermining the memory of the Holocaust, in which my great-grandparents were slaughtered and burned alive, this is the biggest trauma this generation has experienced.
It’s not about the number of lives and dreams taken, or about the families that were shattered in a single moment. It is the broken story of a broken promise that no one would hurt us in our own homes, literally or symbolically.
About half a year ago, I wrote the article, “We are not okay – and it’s time to say it out loud.” That was even before the war with Iran, which left us shaken once again, waiting for the next round. During the months since I wrote those words, I have realized how much of that observation has unfortunately been proven true.
These days, I do a lot of research work on storytelling and narratives, and this is what I realized: The only way to change a story – personal or collective – is by taking responsibility and ownership over reality. That’s the ownership part of the Positive Narrative Ownership Storytelling (PNOS) model, which I developed.
It means that instead of waiting for someone else to take care of us, we take responsibility for acknowledging what hurts and for starting to heal. We take ownership over the truth that today, no one truly feels safe at home anymore. This realization has consequences in every aspect of our lives: financially, demographically, emotionally – and in the overall quality of life for us and our children.
Change begins within
Even if others are at fault for the trauma that was allowed to strike us, and if our leaders should be resigning, I still believe that change must begin where we actually can make a difference – within ourselves.
It is our national duty to take care of our trauma and to admit that we are suffering. The Israeli nation has been living through an ongoing trauma. Yes, some people flourish under pressure and manage to move on, but the mark remains. It bursts out in unexpected moments: in supermarket lines, in road rage, in emotional or physical violence, in classrooms, and in homes.
Still, here lies the positive side: While we cannot stop Iranian missiles or prevent every terror attack or antisemitic act, if we can recognize our trauma, speak it, and redirect it toward growth – each of us in our own way – we might be able to create some peace within our homes, and maybe feel a little safer again.
The writer is a communication strategist, lecturer, and creator of the Positive Narrative Ownership Storytelling model.